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21 January 2006 @ 11:35 am
 
Title: Determined
Author: Cas ([info]virtualpersonal)
Written for: [info]spander132
Betaed by: [info]iadorespike
Fandom: BtVS
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: NC-17
Characters: Not mine, Joss' - I'm just playin' with 'em
Concrits: welcome in comments

Summary: Think Sleeping Beauty flash fic, for purpose of showing the emotion: “determined”



The sun dipped below the horizon, taking the last traces of the fiery red Sedona sky, and leaving behind a blanket of darkness over the desert. Xander sat cross-legged, as he had for hours. Was it a cheap tourist trick, or was this for real? He’d been told that if you sat without moving until you fell asleep, and if you concentrated on a question hard enough... you’d find answers here in the land of vortexes.

Okay, there was the pipe you had to smoke too. But that was a detail. He’d had to wait until his body was numb, before lighting it. Then he’d smoked and gone all light-headed. And now he was finding it harder and harder to concentrate on his question.

I like Spike more than I should. What do I do? Run like hell? Get Willow to tell him? Have Buffy kick his ass for making me feel all weird when he’s around?

The warm desert breeze caressed his face. He wanted to push the hair out of his eyes, but found his limbs were too heavy. The air seemed to thicken around him...he felt some sort of undertow... and then the desert disappeared.

*

“No, you can’t do it Xan, it’s too crazy.” Buffy stood in his way. “It’s dangerous.”

Xander gave her a small smile. “I know Buff, but I gotta.”

“What do you mean you ‘gotta’? You don’t even know him! He’s just some vamp who crossed the wrong witch. It doesn’t mean you gotta get yourself killed over it.”

“The book... it said Spike saved humanity. Don’t you think he deserves to be saved by humanity?” He countered.

“It’s a legend. No one knows for sure he’s there,” she said, looking at the tower sitting on the hill above the city. It was surrounded by a thorny bush that was said to be alive and murderous. No man or woman who’d forced their way through it had come back out. “It’s been hundreds of years. Hundreds of people have died trying to get to him... for what?”

“Buff...”

“Cut the crap, Xan. You know we have to be ready for the next apocalypse and can’t waste time on this. It’s been there for years... why now?”

“In the book... I saw his picture. His eyes...”

“His eyes,” she nudged him with her elbow – hard. “You’re not getting killed over a pair of vampire eyes,” she said, then grabbed his arm and started dragging him home. “Even if you got through the thorns... even if you could wake him... he would be hungry and make a nice little Xan-shake out of you. Can’t have that.”

Over his shoulder, he took a last look at the tower. That was where his destiny lay. One look at the picture had been enough to convince him. He’d bet Spike had blue eyes...

Long after dinner, after the patrolling and after the goodnights, Xander made his way up Lost Man’s Hill. There were warnings posted, almost every mile along the way ... skull and cross-bones and warnings about the deadly vegetation. The government had never been able to kill it or clear it away.

And then he was there, in front of the thick wall of thorns, visible by the light of the moon. It was all sharp edges and angles, and looked like the teeth of a gigantic Venus Fly Trap.... only with lots and lots of mouths. The silence of the night was pierced by cracking sounds and snapping sounds. He could feel waves of hunger emanating from the hedge.

Fear warred with his other emotions. He didn’t want to die. He was too young to die. He had to live, ‘cause yeah, Mr. Blankton would have no one to make fun of in class, and the teacher hadn’t run out of colorful names to call him. Who would wanna miss that in their life? Not Xander Harris, nope.

But those eyes. They’d spoken to him, deep in his soul.

He’d heard them scream for help.

Slayers had died fighting the thorny bush. Men, women and children had died. Animals who found their way into it never came out.

A smart guy would leave.

Grabbing a thick branch, Xander started pulling it aside so he could make his way in. Mr. Blankton was right... the guy upstairs had sewed his brain in backwards.

One. Two. Three. Four. He counted to fight his imagination. He counted to try to drown out the sounds and groans from the hedge. He counted to try to concentrate on something other than the pain. Looking back, he saw he’d only moved a couple of feet... and yet his hands were torn and bloody, his arms and legs too. Those damned thorns had already cut him up, but good.

Turn back. Run.

He took another step. And another. The hedge started moving. Tendrils started encircling his ankles, climbing up in a corkscrew path, cutting him, gripping him.

He screamed. He ranted. He cursed. He fought. He plodded on.

And when he thought he could take no more, he took a final step and broke out of the hedge and into a small clearing. The door to the tower was open. An invitation.

The minute he stepped inside, torches lit up. Shocked, he slammed into the wall, leaving a bloody smear along it’s surface as he started up the spiral staircase. It was quiet. Deathly quiet.

Heart pounding, he fought the instinct to run. One step at a time, he made his way to the door at the top and pushed it open.

There... in the center of the room ... sat a four poster bed. The vampire, Spike, lay on it. Slowly, Xander approached, swallowing hard. Xander-shake No, that didn’t sound good.

Still... look at him. Alabaster skin stretched tight over fine features, sort of edgy and sharp. Like the dangerous thorns ... but beautiful. Long blond hair, down to his shoulders. Lips that were well defined... made for kissing. A longing stole over Xander. When he bent over to kiss Spike, it wasn’t because of the legend... it was because he wanted it. He wanted so badly to feel that mouth under his, to be the first in centuries to kiss him.

Nothing happened. Xander tried again. This time he forced his tongue past closed lips, and put everything he had behind the kiss.

Strong arms came up behind his back, pulled him down hard. The vampire fixed his hand behind Xander’s head, and kissed him back like there was no tomorrow. The gentle sucking on his tongue grew harder, causing Xander to get dizzy. It was a good thing he was being held in place, ‘cause otherwise ... could be he would have been introducing himself to the floor. Only when he ran out of breath was he allowed to break the kiss and stagger back.

“You’re no Slayer,” Spike sat up.

Xander couldn’t help thinking the vampire looked like a prince. It was the clothes, the poet shirt with frilly sleeves especially. And his eyes... oh yes, they were blue. “No. Friend-of-Slayer count?”

“You count. The year?”

“It’s ah... well it’s two thousand.... ah...guh...” the weight of the vampire’s gaze was making him all nervous. And when the look sharpened, rested on his bloodstained hands, and shirt, a shiver of fear slid down his back.

“You have a strange manner of speech in the year two thousand guh.” Spike got up and started to walk toward his rescuer. “Name?”

“Xan... Xander.” He took a step back. Fuck... like Buffy said, the guy looked hungry. Course the smell of blood had to be getting to him. And the sight. Oh man... he really should have cleaned up or something....

“Xan Xander. A bit odd, but I like it. Why are you moving about like a target ring...”

“Ah...” ‘Cause I’m scared? Xander licked his lips, touched the wall with one hand, and started walking backwards down the stairs. “I don’t know... but.... ah...” Fuck, he was being stalked.

“Stop.”

The vampire’s voice washed over him. The minute he stopped, he found Spike inches away, a hand against the wall on either side of his body. Trapped. The pulse point at the base of his neck jumped.

“Why are you scared? You weren’t scared before. Didn’t turn into the big bad wolf all of a sudden, did I?”

“No.. it’s not that.”

“What then.”

“You look hungry.”

“Yes.”

“You haven’t eaten in hundreds of years.”

“Ah... I haven’t done something else in hundreds of years. Hungrier for that, yeah?”

“What... oh.” Then that glorious mouth was moving over his lips, and those strong arms were lifting him up, and he didn’t know quite how, but they were back upstairs, and in a tub. It was a spell, it had to be. But he didn’t care. Spike was washing all the grime and blood off him, caressing him, whispering things in his ear.... things he didn’t understand, didn’t need to.

Then they were out of the water, and all over each other. Kissing. Struggling to get closer. Pushing each other up against walls, against the corner-posts of the bed, dragging each other to the floor and laughing. Skin against skin. Mouth against hungry mouth. Groin against groin, they moved together.

The slow burn turned into a fiery inferno of desire and pleasure. Lifting his hips, Xander was more than ready for his new found lover. He didn’t know Spike, and yet he’d known him all his life. Would give him his life if that was what the vampire demanded.

“That’s it, that’s it,” Spike crooned as he entered Xander, kissing him soundly before thrusting deep inside. Between the sudden fullness, the stroking of his sweet spot just so, and the pressure of Spike’s belly rubbing against his erection, Xander came apart. Holding onto Spike, he cried out his name, over and over, lifting his hips, seeking and finally finding his release at almost the same moment as the vampire.

“Mine.”

“Mine.”

*

His lips were dry and cracking. The hot blaze of the sun bothered his bleary eyes. Xander pushed up off the ground and put one hand over his forehead to shade his eyes as he headed for his jeep. At first, his steps were slow. But as he processed the vision, he knew what he had to do. Follow his heart. Tell the vampire what was what. Then see where the chips fell.

Sure footed, he reached the jeep and slammed the door shut. In his mind, he calculated how quickly he could drive back to Sunnydale and have the talk he should have had with Spike, so long ago.

 
 
( 36 comments — Post a new comment )
iadorespike: prettysx by essene[info]iadorespike on January 21st, 2006 07:36 pm (UTC)
Oh, Cas...I just love your 'vision quest as fairy tale' take on 'determined'. This is a lovely and very different addition to the mood ring! Thank-you!

Anna *hugs you*
Virtual Personal: Spander Coffin - by Fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:23 am (UTC)
Glad the vision quest/fairy tale cross over worked for you ::grins:: *hugs back*
Ironlily - Making My Marque: animeangeldevil[info]vikingprincess on January 21st, 2006 08:25 pm (UTC)
oh, I love it! and you know I never read any Spander before I knew you... it's an amazing new world, and you know how much I love the schmoop.... thanks for writing it!
Virtual Personal: spike bad evil thing - vampkiss[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:24 am (UTC)
Yes yes yes, I did a gooood thing then ;) Glad you liked the schmoop!
Lorraine[info]lunabee34 on January 21st, 2006 08:45 pm (UTC)
I love reworkings of fairy tales. Plus, magical dope smoking. Heeeeee

Great read!
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:31 am (UTC)
Dope induced fairy tale! Hadn't quite thought it through, lol! Glad you enjoyed it :)
Cara (aka) Lady Flame: Spander poetry[info]ladyflame_uk on January 21st, 2006 09:01 pm (UTC)
Huh, that's a weird coincidence, I'm about 3/4's through writing a 'fairytale' fic myself... Three Scooby's & The Big Bad Vamp!! But I think I'm gonna save it for my first posting day at [info]spring_with_xan which is the 22nd March, I might even get someone to beta it, since I'm usually too impatient to wait to post stuff once I'm finished!! XD
Virtual Personal: Spander Coffin - by Fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:34 am (UTC)
More fairytale fic, yay... always a good thing ::grins:: Can't wait to read it :)
Wycked[info]nyghtpet on January 21st, 2006 09:28 pm (UTC)
Considering Sleeping Beauty is my favorite fairy tale, disney or otherwise (AURORA LOOKS BEST IN BLUE!!!!) I loved this for the sheer Sleeping Spike idea alone. I would happily fight through thorns for that.

This made me all warm and fuzzy. yum yum. Thanks! *tackles you in joy of sleeping beauty story*
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:36 am (UTC)
When I wrote it, I wondered if fairytale Spander might be too weird. Now I'm glad I wrote it. I'm also a great fan of Sleeping Beauty ::grins:: So glad something fun to write gave ya the warm and fuzzies!
Tam 'O Bedlam: haremspikeangstpuppy[info]angstpuppy on January 21st, 2006 09:44 pm (UTC)
Oh, this was beautiful. Loved the concept of the vision quest wrapped up in a fairy tale. I wish I could paint, I'd do a picture of the first glimpse Xander gets of spike on that bed, yum.
Virtual Personal: Spander blinds - by kazzy_cee[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:41 am (UTC)
Lovely compliments *beams* Thank you so much! And hmmm, a picture like that would be lovely, you're right!
Becky: Glee[info]cinderella81 on January 21st, 2006 10:07 pm (UTC)
Just caught this on AFF ... it is totally schmoopy and sweet and I love it!!!
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:43 am (UTC)
Heee, glad you liked it! Though I am an angst ho, somehow lots of my writing has been schmoopy lately. *nods*

Thank you very much for taking the time to comment. *hugs*
woman_of_[info]woman_of_ on January 21st, 2006 11:28 pm (UTC)
Wow Sleeping Beauty finds his handsome prince. Great vision Quest, really go Xander going after what he wants.
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:44 am (UTC)
Love those happy endings ::grins:: Thank you, glad you liked the dream quest/fairy tale mix.
My good intentions went up in smoke...[info]jans_intentions on January 22nd, 2006 03:43 am (UTC)
Oh, lovely and hot, sweetie!
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:49 am (UTC)
Glad a bit of fairy tale schmoop hit the spot. Thank you! *hugs*
fearless5555[info]fearless5555 on January 22nd, 2006 05:27 am (UTC)
Lovely. I thought that the introduction of a fairy tale by way of spiritual quest was brilliant. You also wrote the whole thing so in character which made it wonderfully easy to suspend disbelief....thanks for sharing.
Virtual Personal: Spike Belt - by catvampcrazines[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 01:51 am (UTC)
I was worried about how a fairytale spander tale would fare, and I'm really glad you found it plausible. Thank you very much for commenting, I really appreciate it.
my monkied brain: s/x - tender kisses[info]katekat1010 on January 22nd, 2006 05:31 am (UTC)
so sweet and utterly adorable! thank you lady.
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 02:04 am (UTC)
You're so welcome *big smile* Glad the schmoop worked for you!
reddwarf75[info]reddwarf75 on January 22nd, 2006 06:46 am (UTC)
I like Spander fairytales *bounce bounce* very much :)
Marie
Virtual Personal: Spike time - by Enn_enn[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 02:06 am (UTC)
Glad to hear it. I'm probably gonna write a "merman xander" story in the next couple months ::grins:: Don't know if it will be schmoop or combo of that and angst, probably the latter.
lusciousxander[info]lusciousxander on January 22nd, 2006 08:59 am (UTC)
Aw I love fairytales! Especdially Spander fairytales, actually nothing but Spander fairytales! Can you write more Spander fairytales?
Virtual Personal: Spander you know theyre doing it - by na[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 02:14 am (UTC)
LOL, you're so funny! You want more Spandery fairytales. Well, I'm probably going to write one where Xander is a merman, for [info]spring_with_xan. Hope it comes out good and that you get a chance to read. I think my posting date is in March, so there is a bit of a wait :)

Thanks!
lusciousxander[info]lusciousxander on January 23rd, 2006 08:30 am (UTC)
Awww I can't wait! I've always enjoyed The Little Mermaid, and to have it Spander style is just WOW!! Hurry up *g*
Nash[info]nashmaveric on January 22nd, 2006 03:13 pm (UTC)
::grin:: Love the interesting dream thing. Specially this line:
“You haven’t eaten in hundreds of years.”

“Ah... I haven’t done something else in hundreds of years. Hungrier for that, yeah?”
::snicker::
Virtual Personal: spike smoking name - by fearkills[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 02:15 am (UTC)
Spike can have a one-track mind, as you well know ::grins::
REMITYGIRL[info]remitygirl on January 22nd, 2006 06:35 pm (UTC)
'DETERMINED'
Oh, that was lovely...and um, hot! I love first times between these two..even if it's only in a dream. Well done!! Thanks for sharing!
Virtual Personal: Spike Belt - by catvampcrazines[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 02:17 am (UTC)
Re: 'DETERMINED'
You're welcome, and I'm very glad you enjoyed it. Thanks a million for commenting :)
HellZiggy: Fairy Spike[info]hellziggy on January 23rd, 2006 07:35 am (UTC)
*sigh* You write the best Spander!
This was fabulous!
Virtual Personal: Spike determined - by fanbot[info]virtualpersonal on January 23rd, 2006 07:45 am (UTC)
Awww thank you so much. That is the BEST comment ever ::grins:: *Hugs you tight*

If you enjoy the TAT series, the first part of the next story is up *nods*
rayne_y_daze[info]rayne_y_daze on January 24th, 2006 03:11 am (UTC)
Oh, I love this! I adore fairy tales, and when I get one with characters I love, so much the better :-)
Virtual Personal: Spike B&W - Literati[info]virtualpersonal on January 24th, 2006 09:26 am (UTC)
Thank you, and I'm glad it hit the spot :)
sablerose2[info]sablerose2 on February 25th, 2006 05:10 pm (UTC)
Never look at Sleeping Beauty the same way again and I thank you for that *giggles*